A Reason To Live
by Jillcb
Summary: This is a Merlin/Sefa story which follows on from Something Special. Merlin is back in Camelot and is looking back at his life, and also looking forward to the future.


**A Reason to Live**

It was the end of a beautiful day, and Merlin gazed up at the cloudless sky a piece of grass dangling from his mouth. He was laying in a beautiful meadow, full of wild flowers, the scent which flew around his body, forcing him to inhale in all its beauty.

There was a time when he dreaded such days as these. They were days when he harped around attempting to find a job to do to cover the hurt that was still raw inside his heart. Days when he would be haunted by endless images of those that he'd lost, through the years.

Sometimes those images would still torture his mind, when he found himself alone. So many people had died his best friend and King, his first love, his father, his best friend. For a second he closed his eyes and attempted to make his overactive mind relax. He opened his eyes slowly feeling a soft breeze ruffle his hair as he did so.

As he gazed around the meadow he admitted to himself that it was a beautiful spot. Where he was lying he could still see the white towers of Camelot, but all around him were fields showing off their summer wears. He smiled to himself as he remembered the last time that he had lay here, and with whom.

There was no doubt about it she had saved him. From the moment he had stumbled across her that day. She had taken him in, and fed him, looked after him kept him alive. He had sat there in her little hut giving her no encouragement, wanting only to join Arthur in his endless sleep. Not for the first time he wondered what it was that had made her so determined to keep him alive. He had hated himself at the time; he felt he had failed everyone.

Even now he still felt like a failure, he hardly dared say it anymore though. He remembered the look on her face when he had last spoken the words. How tears had fallen from her eyes, and such a haunted look on her lovely face, that he had hated himself for even muttering the wretched words. He swore from that day on he would make the most of their time together, and attempt to make a life for himself.

That evening they had come to the same meadow lying in the middle of the flowers, just as he lay now. They had talked, laughed before making love until the sun had disappeared, and the darkness had begun to swirl around them in their loving slumber. He realised now that was the first day that his new life had taken hold of him. The first time he had allowed himself to hope that just maybe he could find some happiness in his lonely world.

"What are you doing?" her voice ended in an endearing laugh, as she studied him.

"Just having a quiet moment before madness descends on me." he laughed back.

"Madness!" she dug him in the ribs with her hand. "You really know how to flatter me."

They laughed, before sharing a brief kiss. Suddenly a voice interrupted them.

"Daddy!"

Merlin sat up, a smile on his face as he watched his little girl attempt to make her way across the meadow to him. He got up holding his arms out to her, marvelling at how quickly she had already grown. Seeing him there smiling, had encouraged her to increase her speed. Merlin laughed as he watched her waddle along giggling as she went.

Suddenly she took a stumble, in a flash Merlin eyes had flashed orange and she was magically righted. It had earned him a light slap.

"Merlin I keep telling you, she has to learn." Sefa said.

"Look at her." Merlin said he bent to pick her up in his arms. "I could never bare to see either of you hurt." He gave his gurgling daughter a kiss on the cheek. For a second he felt insanely happy, and he longed to shout it out.

"What is it?" Sefa asked as if sensing his mood.

"I'm just so happy, you two make me feel so alive." he smiled. "I never thought I'd have the chance to be so blessed."

"I keep telling you Merlin." Sefa smiled kissing him. "We are the ones that are blessed having you. I will never tire telling you that."

"And I'll never tire hearing it." Merlin grinned.

"Daddy look!"

Merlin looked ahead at where his daughter was excitedly pointing. He smiled as he saw a young doe, suddenly appear. For a second they starred at it, until it disappeared off into the forest.

Not for the first time, Merlin counted his blessings realising just how easy it was to take things for granted in life. He vowed he would never do that. From this moment on his life with Sefa and Sian would take priority. It was time for even the mighty warlock to put himself and his family first.

"I think it is about time you met my mother." Merlin said. "We will leave for Ealdor tomorrow."

Sefa smiled at him. "I would really like that."

"Come on I think it's my turn to do the dinner." Merlin replied, as Sian began to fall asleep, in his arms.

Merlin smiled as Sefa put her arm around his waist, and they slowly made their way home.


End file.
